I’m in book publishing, so I am aware that there are a standard of book sizes that roam the shelves of bookstores, both mini-mall and domestic alike.

Book publishing is not the Wild West. Even with indie publishing.

People don’t write their novel, hawk into a spittoon and then say “Yes, sirree! I’m gonna pub-leesh this here master of pieces and make it one inch wide by seventeen inches long. That’ll go perfect with the first book in the series I published in the shape of my cat. Yeeehaw!”

(I think when you sign up for life and pull the “I want to be a writer” attribute, it automatically comes with introversion and whisker magnetism.)

Nope, there are standards.

Standards, people!

And they are pretty darn universal.

Stephen King or a Pregnancy How-To, what readers expect of their books when their expecting a book published is 6 x 9.

Yes, there are the trade papers that can sneak down into the 5.5 x 8.5, even those sassy slimmers that squeeze themselves into a 5 x 8.

But unless you are in coffee-table land, hitting up college classrooms, or the Bible (now there’s the Wild West on sizing, though God’s more in the epic to epic-er range)—the majority of the books in the trade paperback and hardback sizing world are 6 x 9.

If you love yourself a good mass-market pb (paperback not peanut butter, though it’s me and it’s my blog so you should have expected a food reference a little sooner than later).

(yummmmm..pb….)

(Those of you that are often blog readers might be looking for a good solid swoon from me as I have been pretty solid in stature of late. As opposed to my first run of blogs that were littered with airborne moments of myself and readers alike. Start reading from the beginning and see for yourself. It’s a hoot.)

(You know you want to.)

…so if you love yourself a good mass-market paperback, which has been my bread and butter (fooood) for years, then that has been the same exact size for decades and decades…

Until the utter travesty that befell the reading realm when the over-tall mass-market came into being.

Why?

Why would you do that?!?

Charlton Heston is my wingman as I gnash my teeth and cry out in damning dramatics at all publishers that deigned to lower themselves with such a monstrosity —and confuse readers and really make the reading experience awkward and terrible with that top heavy piece of—

(Oh no.)

(I feel it coming on.)

(And it’s a big one.)

(Prepare yourself!)

“Why God, whyyyyyyyyyyy!!!”

(aaaaaand…)

*SWOON*

But ultimately I want to get back to the standard sized book — the 6 x 9. Because there is the rub.

Right. You need more.

I got there in my brain, but I need to kinda pull you there along with me.

I need to get to the rub part.

U-HAUL — and other box makers — have actually made a BOOK box design. One that is specially designed for books. Smaller to take into account that, as we discussed in the pervious blog , they have a severe flaw that can ruin your relationship with your books if you ever have to do the dreaded action of moving them.

Yes, this is a box design, specifically to house BOOKS. In the perfect dimensions to fit your books. Utilizing the most space possible.

Right?

Let’s do a little book-moving math and see, shall we?

The standard size of most of your books will be 6 x 9.

Great.

To have two stacks in a box, that box needs to be what? 12 inches wide and 9 inches long.

On the inside.

It is amazing the difference a quarter of an inch makes. Truly. Because people who love books usually LOVE books, so to set two stacks of books next to each other in a box, see the cover and precious pages start to arc up due to just the tiniest lack of space…

It’s like starting your washing machine a sudsing and seeing poor Fluffy’s wide eyes in panic behind the frothing glass after being woken up from a deep sleep in a perfect den of smelly towels to being WET and forced to tumble about like a happy dog.

One desperate paw to the glass.

Help me.

Those books (and Fluffy!!) are out of that box so fast! With caresses to the cover to right it into perfect level flatness again. Apologies in full, with a scathing look at the offending cardboard cube.

Yes! Specially designed to fit your books ALMOST perfectly.

There we go! I finally got there.

“And there’s the rub.”

Because no stuffing or arranging or willing the box a little bit bigger (or cursing) can gain back that strategic quarter inch.

I don’t know why it was done that way.

But it was. And it is crazy making.

And anyone who has moved (or tried to and said, “Nope, I’m here till I die. Sorry, Mom.”) you know how close to that crazy edge you ride at any (and every) stage of the moving process.

Et tu, U-HAUL?